I have discussed that I have had a history of migraine and sleep disorder for decades. These are both minimal at this point, thank G-d!
However, on Saturday I have an appointment to put my beloved pit bull, Luke down. Although I was able to help him heal one open, nasty tumor, others persisted. Yes, Luke has several different types of cancer, and at age 9, for a large dog, he has lived a full life.
So sorry for those of you with serious illnesses or severe financial or family issues, who think all of this trivial. However pets come into our lives to serve us. They are naturally in the alpha brain wave and we attune to their vibration when we are upset. Yes I have seen MANY suicidal clients who state with awe: “Oh that’s why my cat jumps into my lap when I am in despair!”
Lately, as Luke is slowing down, he stays inside more and more. He howls when my phone rings and I am out picking my greens, to notify me that I have missed a call. Luke sees how grateful I am and has now taken to howling when a text tone even sounds off. Amazing at how my loyal pet still serves me.
Luke attacked a bear on two occasions last fall, when it was wreaking havoc to my fruit trees. Luke actually got raked by the bear twice. He ran the bear off down the hill, coming home limping and exhausted. He sees it as his job to protect and serve me, beyond any of my expectations.
Last night, I was working on a video, (sorry I am not getting one out this week,) and I played a horse clip with a horse hoof thumping onto the dirt. That slight animal noise alerted Luke from his sleep, and he started barking and growling for me from his bed. Animal instincts are so strong, yes he heard a very slight animal sound on my computer. This innate instinct and Luke’s protective behavior, in his weakened state, brought tears to my eyes.
Back to my sleep problems. As I have set the date with a veterinarian, and we have dug the grave, I did not sleep particularly well last night. I actually had a nightmare and woke up after four hours of sleep. I forced myself to relax and calm myself, (an oxymoron, but works!) Yes I did lie awake in the middle of the night, for over an hour. I did not beat my self up and toss and turn frustrated. After a period of positive affirmations, deep breathing, and self soothing, inner talk, I was able to return to sleep for a few hours.
So no matter what the environment is doing around you, you are in control of your reactions. I only speak of Luke, however, there are many stressors in my life currently. I just do not wish to burden you. If you wish to continue to read my drama, I will explain just one more negative event.
Another stressor, a teenager, came out of nowhere riding a bike and I collided with him, head on in my car. There were three ambulances, and five police cars and a sheriff’s car. Rumor has it that the kid is fine, except for stitches over one eye. However rumor also states that I hit two kids walking in a crosswalk, (totally untrue!) When I was in shock after the accident, a cop said, “It could of been worse, you could of killed a kid in the crosswalk.” I have been waiting for the police report for a month now.
So life can throw us challenges at every turn. It is how we deal with these challenges that is important. I am fine no worries, I have my tools in my tool box to handle my stress.
E-mails and condolences are nice, and thanks for caring! However I would just prefer a like on my two youtube videos with Luke inserting himself into them. “Forming New Neuronal Pathways,” and “Piezio Electric Effects of EFT.” Thanks in advance!
As always light and love…
Divora Stern, LCSW
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“Author of upcoming book “Fall, Get Up, Brush Off, Repeat”
Stumbling from the Depths, To Higher than High